kl23. un jour emmerdé

寫了一封三頁的信給三年不見的相識。
不記得上一次認真寫字是什麼時候，更不記得上次認真寫信是什麼時候。
寫字令人心安。

原來要轉達這三年的生活用三頁的信可以道盡，儘管一言難盡。
--
今天Alexa崩潰的時候我也幾乎要崩潰，
我這才知道不用動腦的事情也可以這麼令人崩潰。
難道是我太脆弱了嗎？

deep breath, i said.
tout va bien, ell a dit.

oui tout va bien demain.

kl22. seule au bureau

and copy and paste and copy and paste.

one way to get more positive: lunch

Alexa is on a five-day vacation and i suppose Diane was right.

When you have too much liberty in the office, prudence and autonome are vital and crucial.

平衡

一個人住的時候，除了生病以外，最痛苦的事莫過於換床單了。

聽說一般人半年到一年換次床單，剛搬來台北的時候我們好像兩年換一次。

可是現在三個月就想換。

大概是某種jouissance。

--

地板芭蕾 sh'bam 嘻哈 爵士 現代舞

這個禮拜要學lindy hop，噯，喜歡。

kl19. elle part

Fédérik: il faut pas attendre ce que tu veux, il faut y chercher.

Diane leaves today.
I think after six months, I will become excel expert, and man expert.
--
It was a very eccentric feeling.
We barely know each other, at least not in a very friend way.
But I feel so sad.

There are collegues that you can never forget.

One Day

好像有人說，花上大半輩子去等一個人太不值得。

可是很多時候等待是一種歸納，其實並沒有等待，只是一直沒有岔路可以前往。

I'd always loved to see the aging process.

It is nice to become old, and struggle to be wise to choose.

Alabama Monroe

剛來不久的不久前一點點的夏天它在巴黎上映，
剛來不久一陣子鹹鹹悶熱的夏天樹映下有這部片的海報。
我想看，始終沒看它就下片了。
後來我發現想看一部片卻不費心事先理解它內容劇情是一件好事。

後來G跟我說這是一部傷心的片，但他很喜歡。
我一直記得，記到兩年後終於看了。

人生片單之一。
人生片單裡的每部片形成人生漫漫形影裡的片片影子。
也可能是片片影子構成長長的片單。

kl17. extremely silence

An extremely silent morning.

No work at all???!!!!
How's that possible??!!!

hashtag wronginternshiptobe

___
You have to tell yourself thousand times that it's normal not to know everything, if not anything.

kl15. the routineness of life

nine forty seven in the office.
sun light, tranquillity.

content and form.
love and porter.

the sense of whole newness.
over and over again.
over und over weiter.

kl12. it hurts

Boss cried today cuz she had too much workload.

I think I like her very much.

Do you want to work in a fun way in a serious environment or in a serious way in a supposedly should be fun environment?

She chose the first.

I am still searching.

And before that I need a massage.

And indeed I am not the few.

good news

deux semaines de vacances pendant aout yabeeee

a very negative and complaining one.

I just think that we all have a certain routine when we go back home from a whole occupying day and feel like being alone, or be with the right one, the one that you can have a simply have a hug with and saying nothing.

I just think that we do have different personality and if we can show the least respect for that, the atmosphere can be nice.

No in fact the atmosphere was nice because I was showing hospitality, or at least I thought I did.

Damn how could be so stressed by such situation.  I think I was too tolerated back home, where you don't have to show hospitality to no one.

Damn.

My routine is, take off clothes, check my phone, write down the bill, put groceries in the kitchen if any, take out books from handbag, arrange the sport clothes, take shower, cook.

I know well I am a maniac but for gods sake who isn't.

Damn, a little bit of inform would have been very kind.

Damn, and now I had shower at ten oclock and cannot dry my hair cuz she is goddamn sleeping.

What kind of roommateslife is it?

And all she said was to change my goddamn lifestyle.

I wash my hair everyday, I take shower every night, I like to listen to English news every morning(damn she said you are not in London!  what the fuck).

breathe, deep breathe.

But you see, in fact this kind of episode shows itself whenever you get too close to someone, when you live with someone, whether lover or simply a roommate.

Hence choose wisely.

我早上愛聽英文新聞就聽英文新聞啊啊啊啊啊啊啊

damn

kl10. what is crowdfunding?

「香港人總是說你有鬥志你就可以捱出生天，但無論你有多好的體力和鬥志，你睡不夠，吃不夠，加上極差的條件，日復一日，你的鬥志始終會消亡，身體會變壞。就像在刨鉛筆，不是愈刨愈尖，而是愈刨愈短，最終只會被完全消耗掉。」
--

晚上和Diane去ESCP參加la fête de crowdfunding的籌備會，我不知道原來群眾募資在法國還不太算興盛（還是其實是台灣不興盛而我只看到海平面上的閃亮亮的冰山），與會者爭相發言，好像早該習慣法國人那種幾乎要吵起架來的討論，但不禁還是冒了一把冷汗。


我在嘖嘖上面買了一對錶，在ISCOM也時常接觸到群眾集資的創業概念，並且超級喜歡indigogo的辦公室，只是在這背後似乎相關聯的不只是「我有idea你喜歡就用錢支持我已讓我回饋你的支持」，只是一個平台的創生共榮還包含了銀行（到頭來）與法律條文的牽扯。


「Crowd-Funding就是透過人與人的合作，宣傳以及互相信任，成功的將現有的資源和資金結合，並支持特定的人或者組織。」


「众筹模式在中国的风险

　　成绩是斐然的，不过与国外同行的差距还是非常明显。由于国内的法律、法规等不健全，众筹模式在国内主要面临三方面风险。
非法集资：这是一个老生常谈的问题，由于众筹是面向公众的一种集资模式，按照国内的相关法律，非常容易被扣上非法集资的帽子；
知识产权的保护：由于国内对于知识产权相关的法律保护过于薄弱，导致很多真正的好项目不太敢在众筹平台上募资，因为非常容易被抄袭山寨；
信用环境差：由于国内整体信用环境较差，直接导致违约成本极低，项目发起人的可审核材料并不会太多，导致广大公众的参与度不高。以Kickstarter举例，上线至今已经有超过100万名投资参与者，而国内全部的众筹网站加起来的投资参与者，可能连1/10都未必有。」


因為小小的，台灣用這個來創業感覺特溫馨 特勵志。

房東說，要用吹風機把植物盆裡的泥土吹乾。

房東可以再更天真一點嗎？

merde elle me tellement gene.
ca me soule.

藍色的大門。
藍色的緊身褲。
藍色的頭髮。
藍色的星期ㄧ。

看久了，藍這個字就不藍了。

kl8. no more Monday blue

I dare say that I won't have Monday blue anymore.
The kind of pressure and feel like you are useful to someone and some community, the role of responsibility, like some kind of energy drink.
Or maybe it is simply because I slept for nine hours yesterday and I have my own time before going for work.

The bad part: it seems like there's no any internship program.....tasks are scattered and everything is still mixed up in my head.  I don't know what is the most important and what's the least.
And I fear once Diane leaves I will be so alone.  I do want to work in teams!!!

My voeux for this internship: understand the functioning and system of a law office; be accustomed to an international working environment and the people within; my own tempo of work and life that I can bring to the future me

--


"住宅做為商品的概念，長期經過房地產部門、政府與媒體的聯手打造，在台灣已是發展到極致的根深蒂固。媒體多是對購屋追求房價翻倍的鼓動與名人投資地產理財精明的正面形象，政府與營建業總是對經濟成長有齊心一致的定義而攜手向前，甚至連國小教科書裡都教授我們的孩子要買賣房產追求利潤投機。"

"台北人不是瘋了，而是台灣社會長期缺乏哲學思辨，人民缺乏對政策基本價值原則的理解與共識。他們需要一個過程尋找甚麼是台灣住宅部門應有的功能與樣貌，讓居住不再全然是個人面對一個做為資本積累的房屋市場，不得不陷入此遊戲而要自負成敗的課題。而是共同建構出的，合理的生存機制與權利。"

"這對夫妻是盧梭的信徒，認定財產一旦私有化會帶來社會嚴重的不平等，他們將收入用在小孩的教育和旅行，一輩子都不要買房子！"

從馬斯洛的心理市場學來看，房地產怎麼會炒不起來？

Ellie Goulding - Take Me To Church

Amazing.

Le multilinguisme européen en question

Nous sommes en plein dilemme. Je pense que tout le monde serait capable de vivre avec l'anglais, sauf les Français. Tout le monde serait capable de vivre avec le français et l'anglais, excepté les Allemands. Tout le monde peut vivre avec l'anglais, le français et l'allemand, sauf les Espagnols. A la fin de la liste, il y a les Maltais, et bientôt les Irlandais. Il n'y a pas de solution facile, j'ai bien peur qu'iln'y ait pas de moyen de faire autrement.

--

Je suis desolee mais ce me fait tellement rire.....

kl7. rythme de la vie

週末detent

週間cx

星期五很早就下班，

週末做了兩次瑜伽跳了一次舞，

買了六張DVD（因為法雅客在打折真的），

去了一場apéro，吃了一次brunch，做了三次菜。

Il faisait moche, et froid.

第一個OL的週末。

原來這樣太輕易。

聽說，在電腦面前一整天的工作是完全不可能避免的。

kill me。

還是其實是因為實習生?!

不對，因為長官和隔壁的associe坐了三個小時才起來一次。

生活和人生的平衡呀，不斷想起你們的樣子。

希望Diane不要走。

習慣

拒絕咖啡膠囊。

今天再度騎腳特車回家，我覺得自己非常難改掉我不是行人的習慣，
儘管本來在台北我就喜歡騎馬路，在巴黎也是騎馬路，但顯然有某些時候我們既不是車也不是行人。在行人道被老太太罵，在馬路又被汽車佔去專用道。

台北的地理很適合單車，可是四五年這樣上下學以來，空氣殺人。

我深深明白自己的勇氣在減少，好像我擁有了更多難以失去的一般，ce qui est bizarre

http://womany.net/read/article/6943

我記得我們在車站說好絕不聯絡，六個月後的同一天再聯繫，車廂上告別像是傻子。

但其實每個人對於時間的定義都不一樣。

我不記得後來究竟有沒有再聯絡，我只知道那晚為了他和朋友不告而別我至今都忘記不了。

其實不是這樣的，有些人，儘管有網路的發達，保持聯繫簡單，再見，卻很難。

kl3. 軌道

Today I had my own computer set.  I envisaged again a office lady life; I too much want to move. How can you all do this?

Diane and I went for bagel around two o'clock in the afternoon; we bumped into paparazzi shooting some famous star.  It was very impolite, a very violent scene.  The blond star went directly into the black chic car, like in movies or news.
I thought of the rencontre with Eason in lcg; he was like nobody, at all.

I finished the petit biographie for Friday's 1ere rencontres, a conference that we ought to arrive at six thirty in the morning.
These people are giants in commerce; I research them but I don't know the significance doing this.
How I wish I can have something more publicite or crea.  But anyway, I wish.

It is a very well organized cabinet.  There are lawyers and juries, a logiciel, and many other secters.
Illimite cafe juice sparkling water coke are extremely tempting.
It's not killing us, like I thought it would have, like the exploited and exhausted interns back home.
In fact, the task itself are nothing.  But the environment is something extraordinary.

--
I bet if I were back home, I would never give my boss a cake, ask her how she was doing and wish her a wonderful afternoon with her son.

科技會不會太發達我們會不會過得太舒適以至於死亡

其實呀，我記得小時候大人好擔心手機晚上放在耳朵旁邊或褲腰口袋會有腦癌或子宮癌卵巢癌睪丸癌（我不太確定有沒有這個癌），可是呢，現在手腕上隨時隨地帶一個apple watch或fitbit，會得到手腕癌嗎？

kl2. 當com遇見droit

An awesome day.

Repetitive and tired sitting whole day long.  Like a real OL, which I deteste to become.

Lunch with Diane.  Sortie with other law interns.  It was something that broadened sights, the world of lawyers and atternies and associates.  Un truc enorme.

And today I have to, other than copy paste cellphone number in excel, search for pictures and mini bio of those core people for the conference on Friday.
There are stickers everywhere, so office.

Charming boss and people totally different from ISCOM.

--
How charming?

Alex: my boss.  Her office is right next to mine(if I have one so to speak)  An amazing maniac woman with her seven-year-old son's drawing par tout in her bureau.  A strong personality.

(it turns out that it seems to me every intern has strange office positions.  There are five interns in the RDC in a room facing each other.  There are three interns in the couloir facing roof like a comptoir in the seventh floor.  Diane and me are facing walls, like more concentrated.)

Ramona: a jury.  Phone call all the time, in Romanian, French, English.  I heard her deep breath each time she hung up a phone call.  She needs some yoga i suppose.

Andrea: Romanian law intern.  Super sweet and super warm and nice.  Mais franchement, super.
Marie-Helene: half Greece law intern.  Always smiling and charming.
Maxime: 100%french.  100%cute.  He rides his trottinette in the metro.
*****: A Slovakian law intern.  First rencontre with a motorcycle helmet.
Aurelia: A Lebanon law intern.  Very talkative and with full attention.
Federic: the one went to paris marathon last weekend.  very tall.

Many of them passed the lawyer exam.  They were not serious at all, even when talking about all those cabinet stuff, which I had no idea what it was about.
And Diane, my only partner for next three weeks....and I will be alone....

--
I can still not imagine I am working right next to the Arc de triumphe.
I left the office today after Diane around six thirty.  Alexa was still there.  I offered her a japanese cake.  I actually thought i totally violated the asian working culture: you don't do friend stuff with boss; you dont leave before you boss leaves.
Mais bon, je suis etrangere.

kl1. 律師事務所複製貼上實習第一天

Hard to say a day like this is especially remarkable or, outstanding.

I woke up around five, then around seven, then around seven forty eight.
It was not a sunny day, as yesterday.
I turned on Spotify.
I dressed, as prepared, though again changed twice, or three times, can't clearly remember.(but strangely enough I took my sneakers...)
I made myself coffee and toast.  I did the makeup.
I though of maybe I should have re-done the German and French online lessons; but then I switched on the news.

A grey day like this often depressed people.  But a start-off day like this is another thing.
The metro 6 was so busy.  I did not miss line 14, which was so rapid and there were always seats; on contrary, I quietly laughed several times cuz it was so crowded, and I started to imaging every following day like this to begin my day.
I should have taken the bike.

My superviseur Alexa hadn't arrived as I stepped into the glamorous and smart reception.
I was not nervous at all; but I took some deep breathe.

We met, spitting out streams of French and laugh.  I knew I could handle all these, I knew as long as I knew, I could.
Alexa introduced me to everyone who was already at the office, which were not many of them.
It is a responsibility system, a plus.
Some lawyers were timid and pro.  But most of them were very welcoming.
Other law side interns asked me to join them for the lunch.  I was happy, more than happy.
There was a kitchen, where afterwards I took a coffee and fountain sparkling water.  But there were many other kitchenwares.  I definitely have to use it for lunch some other times.  In fact, if pass an working evening with it would be nice too.  Workaholic mode.

Then I met Diane, another intern in the same communication section.
She will stay till end of March, then I am on my own.
She taught me how to copy paste, which will be my task of the week.  How exciting.
It was an office that I like a lot.
Not the close and walled ones, though not the google or some SF start-up ones either.
I also have my huge desk and a personal Dell pc, like the one Ken had we we met in Taipei.
It took me a while to get used to the pc, but I like it already due to the huge screen.


It was estimated that I would finish the task by Friday; however, in order to attend the Statue ceremony on Friday at six o'clock in the morning, I think I will have it done by Wednesday.

We went together with Alexa and Diane for the lunch in a Lebanon restaurant.  It was my first time having a Lebanon meal; hell delicious.
The lunch went for like more than a hour.  Also they asked me to have ticket resto.  A ten-euro ticket resto will only reduce five euros on the salary.  Why hasn't anyone told me that?

And again I passed whole afternoon copy-pasting, hearing a colleague from another office monitoring a law tax negotiation.  Both Alexa's and her English were excellent, like even better than my international class classmates.

We stopped around six thirty, one hour more than my contract time.
But in fact they say I could have left earlier.

I went for a running.
And I biked from CDG etoile to home, up and down.  The breeze in Paris, the night, the time that has not encountered for a long long time.
At some moment, I thought it could never be more free than this.



An amount of imaginary pictures stroke on me today since the task today was machinery.
I finally kick off my career and can have free time doing my second or third passion aside.
Like lindy hop, like yoga, like jogging, like go sightseeing in the weekends....
Like I arrange my time to wake up at six, go sport, take shower, and go to work; after work I go to dancing club to learn lindy hop.  Like shooting a movie.
Am I being too romantic?

And I am still typing right now, hand shaking, as if the world vibrates it.

--
I've decided on a lot of things.
Like classical music and opera is one of them.

就這樣吧，雨一直下。

因為是三八婦女節所以我三八了一下。
希望從此以後可以多多使用它吹吹風。

I actually decided not to use Internet until tomorrow but i guess i failed.

Lindyhop
Folkdance
Farming cowshit, kindergarten midnight torches.

There were laughs and different sounds.
--

And when I get back, American neighbors are having fun, a gentle nice one.
I can hear the ticking of my watching, four meters away.

我記得昨天下車第ㄧ步就是找人問。

後來host見到面時，問我ㄧ個人旅行的那種automaticity是自然而然的還是需要push的。我說it depends on personality. But for me it's a hundred percent natural.
像是自我生存法則ㄧ樣。後來在夜晚安靜的根特小橋上(像極了Annecy)，我說when you decide to be alone in a hostel, then you are doomed to be alone.
是為什麼，我愛極了couchsurfing的原因啊。

那兩個帶路的陌生人驚訝我沒去布魯塞爾，想來現在的心情是我住在這裡好嗎。
But still its not my favorite one. I guess its still Lyon or Hamburg my favorite city, as an outsider.
Dieter說年輕的時候以為自己十分flexible,往後在哪裡生活都可以。但現在想想還是最愛家鄉Ghent.
我覺得自己還在年輕時段。
黑暗的從巴黎舊家駛往根特的巴士上，我不斷叮囑自己絕不能忘記移動對我的助益，思考，腦袋在轉動的聲音。

有ㄧ個小小的新夢想，當Bartender.

Make My Life Alright

欸不好意思這是我消費者行為這門課的老師，在communicaiton裡叱吒。

有時候會想啊，在球場上風雲的那些人在他們的專業職場上也是踏踏實實專專業業。
那種在人生裡可以用兩份執著發光閃耀的人，真的真的，太吸引人。

大聲宣布

第一次使用棉條就上手。

---

今天幫朋友搬家，想到當初一個人搬了七八趟從西邊到南邊地鐵上上下下就覺得，也是種經驗啊。

I believe there is always something that I don't believe in myself.

But at least this year I delete one.

my graphic design, my babies.  they aren't perfect, but they are my beloved and I am so proud.

林意婷終於在平面設計上會一點皮毛了。

what makes it so important?
isnt it just a fucking dress?
why are we so afraid of being different?